


I Will Love You For As Long As I Shall Live

by TheLaziestMotherfucker



Category: Class (Big Finish Audio), Class (TV 2016), Doctor Who & Related Fandoms
Genre: Angst, Class Volume 4, Depression, Established Relationship, Fluff, Fluff and Angst, M/M, Post-Audio, Post-The Creeper, The Creeper - Freeform
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-07-08
Updated: 2020-07-08
Packaged: 2021-03-05 03:02:08
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,514
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25157443
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TheLaziestMotherfucker/pseuds/TheLaziestMotherfucker
Summary: Charlie and Matteusz go home after the events in The Creeper (Big Finish Audios).
Relationships: Matteusz Andrzejewski/Charlie Smith
Comments: 3
Kudos: 11





	I Will Love You For As Long As I Shall Live

**Author's Note:**

> I got emo, okay?

Depending on who was asked, Charlie had a long, or relatively normal (well, as normal as a gay alien teenage prince massacre survivor can be) list of flaws. According to Quill, every single aspect of his being was a flaw. He didn’t know if he believed she wanted him dead, but he did believe that she wished he had never been born (a concept he wished for as well until recently). But that probably applies to all Rhodians. As for everyone else, his flaws probably vary. He’s too clueless, he’s uneducated, he’s annoying, etc…He thinks his friends love him. He hopes they love him as he loves them, but it seems the underlying issue with his flaws is that he’s _Charlie._ That’s what they always say when he’s done something wrong. 

_“He doesn’t mean anything by it. It’s Charlie.”_

He seems to have plenty of flaws and one by one he is learning them. And hopefully, thanks to his friends, he is bettering himself. 

But that isn’t the point. Charlie knows a few of his flaws and he knows the flaws that people see in him, but arguably his biggest flaw, to him at least, is his unrelenting sense of pessimism. It’s only fair as he lost his entire kingdom, planet, and his mother all within the span of a day that his anticipations of the worst has...well, gotten worse.

Being brought up as a prince, an impending disaster was always something to be expecting. It was needed. Without expecting the worst there was no way of properly preparing and planning. Pessimism was a character trait built into royal blood. Just because he was no longer a proper prince did not mean he stopped seeing the worst of every possible situation. Sometimes the outcome would be surprisingly good, something he wasn’t expecting and was well underprepared for. Other times, one of the million case scenarios were correct. 

And every time he wishes he wasn’t. 

He supposes it’s good then that the universe paired him with an optimist. Charlie liked to think they balanced each other out that way. Matteusz gave hope when Charlie thought there none; meanwhile, Charlie helped his boyfriend study instead of giving in their teenage hormones.

Charlie looked at Matteusz who was holding the rag underneath the faucet. He was so beautiful. And kind. And above all he was gentle. The Shadowkin were lucky Charlie had met him. Without him, who would’ve known what Charlie would’ve done. Maybe he would’ve used the Cabinet a few weeks after beginning school. Maybe he would’ve done it in the dead of night when he was drowning in the screaming memories. Maybe after prom, he would’ve slaughtered them all but Corakinus for the sake of April’s life. After all, what is a ruler without a people? 

But Matteusz would leave him, wouldn’t he? And to Charlie, that was the end of it. It wasn’t just Matteusz that Charlie would lose - it would be everything good and hopeful in the world, too. Charlie thought he would never see anything good in the universe again, but Matteusz showed him differently. He was the light and Charlie doesn’t know what he would do without him. He didn’t want to be lost in the dark again.

But the Cabinet was never meant to be kept hidden in the dark, no matter how much it should be. It exists and Charlie knows one way or the other his hand will be forced and he will use it. Saving the human race - saving Matteusz - would be worth its use. But some people would rather die than turn into a murderer, and lately, it’s feeling less and less like something any of them could afford to choose between. Most of all him and Quill. They aren’t ready to die yet. They don’t want to die yet. They are the last of their legacy and would prefer to keep it that way for however long they could. As much as Quill claims to hate this planet, she would protect it in a heartbeat. They can’t lose another home. 

But he didn’t want to. He didn’t want to be the one who had to save the planet, Charlie just wanted to date his boyfriend and hang out with his friends. Sometimes, deep down, he wished that he could give it to Quill and let it be forgotten, but it was his duty and they were his people. And that made it all the more painful, didn’t it? Because he had his people and his boyfriend with him right now, and he would inevitably lose both at the same time. He still wished despite it. Every time he woke up he wished he could keep Matteusz with him forever. He would grab his limp, sleeping hand, and wished they would never be apart. 

But unlike Matteusz who saw the best in everyone, Charlie knew better, or he thought the worst. He was grateful and surprised Matteusz hadn’t already left him, but eventually, the tides will change and Matteusz will see Charlie for who he could be, or what he already is. Unlike his boyfriend, he wasn’t good. Charlie wanted to be good. More than anything he wished he was enough for Matteusz, but his life has always been a wish, and most of them hadn’t come true. 

Matteusz brings his fingers to Charlie’s chin, lifting his face up and to the side. The other hand brings the rag up to his face and begins to scrub away the dried blood left from the Creepers cut. Charlie looked up at him and Matteusz continued to look at the cut, oblivious to Charlie’s silent admiration of him. Charlie had never loved anyone more. He wished he could express it better than he did, but that was never part of his education. He could speak publicly without a single stumble but when it came to private matters he could only try his best and hope it would convey how he felt. He hoped Matteusz knew. He hoped that no matter what was to come Matteusz did know that Charlie loved him, even if Matteusz stopped loving him back. 

For now, Matteusz did love Charlie. Any doubt he ever had vanished as Matteusz came back to him - as Matteusz came back to protect him. Slowly, Charlie’s fingers trailed up Matteusz’s side, eventually landing on his jaw. He spread his fingers out, cupping his jaw and his fingertips lightly brushing against the hair behind his ear. Matteusz’s eyes met his now. Charlie leaned in, lightly brushing his lips against his boyfriend’s, hoping that he conveyed everything he was feeling, but still feeling like it wasn’t enough. 

And slowly, they broke apart, hands still holding the other’s face. “Are you okay?” He asked, his hand instinctively becoming a bit stronger, worried that Matteusz would disappear again. Matteusz gave him a small smile and kissed his forehead. 

He pulled away and shrugged his shoulders a little bit. “I’ll be fine,” He said, giving Charlie’s cheek one last scrub with the rag. “Will probably not sleep tonight.” He rinsed the rag in the hot water and squeezed it, turning the water into a light pink for a moment. Matteusz turned to look at him again. “But I will be okay. I always am.”

With only a second hesitation, Charlie took Matteusz’s wet hand, not ready to move on yet from the night’s events. “It’s okay to not be okay about these things,” He said quietly, fingers caressing Matteusz’s hand. “I know it’s our normal, unfortunately, but…” He paused, trying to figure out his next words. “Tonight was scary. Quite frankly I don’t think I will ever like Halloween after tonight.”

Matteusz snorted and a smile tugged at his beautiful lips. And what a sight he is.

“But I didn’t see what you did,” Charlie continued. “I know this is _our_ normal, but...I don’t know, really. I don’t want us to treat it as if it’s something just as normal as school. I mean, yes, it’s normal for me - well, more normal for me - but you’ve never seen any of this until you met me, and I can’t understand what it’s like seeing all of this.” Charlie took a deep breath. He did not like rambling like that. He never has and after the time the Emphani snuck into their heads and made them talk nonstop, he doubts he will ever be comfortable with it. “Did any of that make sense?”

Matteusz was still smiling. Unlike himself, Matteusz did like it when Charlie rambled on. He said Charlie’s face starts to get a bit pink and that it’s “adorable”. Matteusz leaned in and kissed him again, his free hand coming up and twisting his fingers in his hair. Charlie squeezed their intertwined hands, savoring the moment a little more. 

“Thank you,” Matteusz whispered, lips hovering over Charlie’s. “And thank you for saving me.”

“Well, you saved me too.” He held onto his boyfriend’s hand a little tighter. “You always do.”

He doesn’t believe that Matteusz knows just how true that is. 

**Author's Note:**

> The Creeper was my favorite out of the new audios and I listened to it again this morning at 6:30 after being awake for an hour. While it is my favorite audio, I don't understand the ending with Quill so just pretend that she's in the house in her room just chilling. 
> 
> Hope you guys (which is probs three people) like this! I projected a lot of my shit onto it. 
> 
> Also as per usual I did not proofread I got too excited to post. I haven't written anything since the beginning of this year.


End file.
